People You Don’t Want to Meet

So a while back I was hoping to make a running segment of mocking craig’s list ads. I had sort of forgotten about it, but in a stroke of boredom I think I came accross the worst one imaginable:

Hank Reardon: I wait, I smile, I keep believing……I love you! – w4m – 24 (dc)


Reply to: pers-802849896@craigslist.org
Date: 2008-08-18, 10:57PM EDT

Hank Rearden. I love you. I am here. – w4m

I see you sometimes, across the platform, just passing me by. I smelled you yesterday walking down K street. Your strong, discplined smell…..and I dreamed of the hours I would drown in just being in your arms, I miss you on my brown skin, in my black hair, in my ear…….. I woke up to your voice last night, only to realize you were so far away…..and it strengthens me…..it makes me even more determined to wait.

I know you are there my dearest. That you are with me. I can stand it most of the time, except for those moments inbetween, purple and gray. Today was harder than the rest. I am keeping my head up, looking forward, trying so hard to not cry…but it’s so difficult. These passed months have been so difficult, so raw, so demanding…but I keep my faith, i continue to believe.

So I will say goodnight… I love you. I love you. I love you.

For those of you who don’t know, Hank “Reardon” is one of the main characters of Ayn Rand’s epic tome Atlas Shrugged, which contains roughly enough paper in one edition to wipe all the asses in Zimbabwe for a year. In this way, it’s quite a fitting testament to Rand’s contempt for all things natural. Anyway, Readren (whose name the poster couldn’t bother to spell correctly) is essentially the uber-capatlist consumed and driven only by his desire to mold the world as he sees fit. Whether or not you think this is a good thing is up for debate, but it really misses the point.

Ayn Rand is a really bad person on whom to base your idea of a good relationship. I’m not sure exactly of the specifics and I’m sure some Randist will comment — as they have wont to do — but I know it involved an affair with a married man who was simultaneously having an affair with another, younger woman. Her relationships seem to have influenced her characters, who can often be found discussing love in lofty, distant, and weirdly absolute terms despite the infrequency of their actual existence. Characters will stare at eachother, “knowing” their love exists, undeterred and unbothered by the fact they sleep with other people because only their love is “real”. Loco.

Rejoice Washington, DC: Another person you don’t want to meet.

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